I can only
imagine what women’s locker rooms at the gym are like, but I just hope they’re
not like the men’s locker room. I’ve
never understood why men walk around the locker naked. And not just for a
couple seconds, but long stretches of time. Usually after exiting the always-clean Jacuzzi and then basking in the
sauna for a quarter hour, they return to the locker room and begin to go about
their business butt naked. And not that
it really makes much of a difference, but the men who do this fall into at
least one of the following categories – overweight, hairy or old.
Seriously,
do these men do this at their homes? Walk around naked, shave naked, sit on a
bench and pick the toe-jam out of their feet while in a long discourse to one
of their pals about how their hemorrhoids are acting up again. In a brief, and
admittedly statistically insignificant, survey of my friends, not a one says
(or at least is willing to admit) that they follow this behavior at home. I don’t have to go to the sink too often at
the gym – my usual path is usually from the door to the locker and out, with a shower
at the end – but in the event I need to wash my hands or I’m shaving in the
morning before heading to work, is it really too much to ask that the folks
next to me not force me to see their hairy ass as I walk up to the sink?
Other
habits I see in the locker defy logic. Shaving
is one thing, but does it make sense to shave at 8pm? If you were going on a
date, that’d be one thing, but trust me, the guys who are shaving at 8pm at the
gym ain’t got a hot date that nite. Then, a couple days, I saw something totally random. A guy puts shaving cream on his face, then,
before shaving or washing any of the shaving cream off his face, proceeds to
brush his teeth. I don’t know about you,
and I’m not a slob, but I usually have a little bit of slobber coming out of my
mouth when I brush. Isn’t that going to go
onto the shaving cream? Again, seriously, who puts shaving cream on his face,
and THEN brushes his teeth.
I can only imagine what happens in the women’s locker room…Then again, I’m guessing women were better off not knowing what happens in men’s locker rooms, so perhaps I’d be better off not knowing either…
Comments